“The past is an illusion, the future is
fiction; there is only now.”
Song: There is only now By Souls of Mischief.
Song: There is only now By Souls of Mischief.
As I am nearing
24th May, 2017 – the day when I will profess to give my whole life
to God, many questions and thoughts are continuously racing through my mind
begging for my attention. Deep questions regarding the real purpose of my life,
‘what I should do with these gifts that He has given me,’ are waiting to be acknowledged by me. And I have realized that these won’t be satisfied with some
superficial answers but real responses that have the power to change the course
of my life and direct it in a particular direction. All along I was thinking
that I am making a decision that would lead me to 24th May; and it
was there that I went wrong.
A powerful
reflection given by Marina Chechi helped me to clear some doubts and give a
clear focus on my calling. And I would like to share it with you. She told me
that my next step is not a decision but a choice. And I asked her, “What’s the
difference?” Her words - Choice is powerful and a decision is not. The word ‘decide’
means ‘to kill’. (Another word to
clear the meaning: ‘sui-cide’, it means ‘to
kill oneself.’) So when I am making a decision, what I am really doing is
killing all the other options and spearheading only towards one point. Well, I thought,
that’s a good thing, isn’t it? Who would want to be distracted by the many
options? Having a clear focus is wonderful, what do you say? But later on, I got
the point. In killing all the other
options, I am throwing them out of my attention. Since, I am not giving them
the attention that they need, they somehow come up in my life in various ways
and pull me down. And that slows down my progress. I am talking about my
vocation here and the many options that I will be killing if I decide to go ahead with this attitude.
Choice – Here I will value the different options I have, give them the attention that is due
and then I make a choice for one which gives meaning to my life. This makes so
many things simple and clear. I am not running away from anything. I become
powerful as I give attention to the one thing that gives meaning to me. And I commit
myself to that choice and live my life accordingly.
Back to the intro lyric: The past is an illusion, the future is fiction; there is only now. The past is an illusion in the sense that I have no power over it. I have power over the present – the NOW. And with the choices that I make, I will CREATE my future. As only few days are left for that big day, I choose to live my days consciously with the help from God; Mary, my mother and with the support from my family and friends.
Back to the intro lyric: The past is an illusion, the future is fiction; there is only now. The past is an illusion in the sense that I have no power over it. I have power over the present – the NOW. And with the choices that I make, I will CREATE my future. As only few days are left for that big day, I choose to live my days consciously with the help from God; Mary, my mother and with the support from my family and friends.