Making a Personal Plan

I want to share my personal experience with you. It is not to play victim or to glorify myself. I was moved to share this so that someone who is in a similar situation will benefit from the same. After all, we are in this world to lift each other to be expressions of the DIVINE.

I had this experience on Thursday, 28^th Feb, 2019, i.e. last week. We usually have free time on Thursdays, where we can go out for a walk. Somehow when I reached my room after having a cup of tea, a feeling of loneliness overtook me. (It is a rare phenomenon for me.) And I was wondering as to what I am doing in my life in my present situation.

I had made a Personal Plan detailing my Vision and my Mission. Sounds fantastic isn’t it? And yet I wasn’t making much headway to become who I want to be. In that moment of loneliness, I remembered my parents, my teachers, my friends, those who shaped me. In that moment, when I felt that I had betrayed all of them by wasting my time, my talents and my true self, I received consolation from up above. I was made to realize that I was focusing too much on myself – Who I should be? What talents do I need to cultivate? What skills I need to acquire? I was wrong. I was told and I fully agree with this - that my life is not about me anymore. It is about all those whom I encounter in my life. I had my Personal Plan outlined, yes. That’s good! I realised that that would be a reality only when it is backed by emotion and conviction. All this while I was only interested in becoming as I planned. That’s where the problem was. I was only interested. I wasn’t committed to become my best version.

So on that day, I committed myself to become the best I could be. Yes, I made a commitment to myself. I thought of making progress in the physical sector in the beginning. Marvellous, isn’t it? And then… And then I failed; I failed within five days. I gave up. I had thought that making a commitment on one day would fuel me to carry on till the end, till I acquire my dream. I was wrong. My so-called-commitment had no base in reality, no practicality because I was not ready to change. I had the idea, a rosy picture of what I could be, if I were to change. But again, there was no conviction. I wanted success without sacrifice. That is not what life is about. I realised that if I wanted to be a different person, I have to start doing things which I was not doing earlier. Only if I do new things, begin new habits it’s then and only then that I would create a new ME. 

Rituals and habits would mark my new ME. All this could be possible only when I have the willingness to change backed by emotion and conviction. Thus, I experienced the joy of cracking the code of Personal Plan for me. Put emotions into the Plan. For I have realised that though, we are intelligent beings, with a quick logical mind, we tend to make many decisions in our daily life based on our emotions. When we are children, we have our parents or guardians to parent us. Now that we are grown up, we have to parent ourselves. We like to be in the state of comfort. We resist change. It is there that our Adult self needs to work; To push ourselves out from our comfort zone. We need to parent ourselves.

Today, I announce to the whole world that I have formed or rather found my conviction that is backed by a strong emotion of gratitude. My new ME awaits me. And I hope to complete Phase One by April 2, 2019.

My greatest realization from this evening: What I am doing must be in line with the fullest expression of Who I Really Am.  

How awesome is God’s way of communicating!!!

Thank You very much.

MARY, THE SHINING STAR IN THE DEEP

What is a STAR? A star is the most luminous light in the sky. A star shows us the way, if we are able to read it. In the history of salvation for us, Mother Mary is the most luminous person when it comes to faith. And she, most definitely, leads us to Jesus. Just remember, “Do as He tells you,” and you will understand. That is why, Vatican II speaks of Mother Mary as the first believer and the best believer. For the Son of God to become man, God needed a woman in whom the Son of God could be conceived, for this God chose Mary.

Let’s us see for ourselves two significance of Mary, being our Shining Star. In the Wedding feast at Cana, Mary intercedes to Jesus to fix a simple issue: a lack of wine at the wedding. From this, we must realize that if Mary can ask Jesus to address something that ordinary, she will certainly intercede for us in any matter, large and small, weighing on our hearts and minds. “Do what He tells you,” sounds very simple, isn’t it? In the case of filling jugs with water, it might have been. What if, those five words were directed to each of us? Here itself, we have to face two challenges. First, to discern what God is calling us to do. And secondly, find the way to go about accomplishing it. Someone rightly said, “The young seminarians are entering into a building, which is already in fire.” Being a follower of Christ, in honesty and integrity, is not easy. Let the words ring in our hearts and minds, Honesty and Integrity!!!

If we go to see, Mary had difficult or rather impossible jobs too. We usually push this fact aside, by saying that, “Oh, she was conceived and born without sin. She had God with her every single step of the way.” Let’s check for ourselves; don’t we all have God with us at every moment? Easier to say than to realize, yes for you and for me. God gives us the grace and the strength that we need. He also gave us Mary, someone who can stand at her Son’s elbow and look at us and say, “Do what He tells you.”

The second significance of Mary, being our Shining Star is to show us how to hear God’s Word. How did Mary hear God’s Word? The Word of God was given to her that she was soon to conceive and then bear a son. She might not have understood a thing about it. In the temple, after searching for Jesus for three days; when questioned, what did Jesus say, “Why did you look for me. Don’t you know that I must be in my Father’s house?” Mary didn’t understand this either. Yet we all know what she did. We see in Luke 2:19 that Mary kept the word in her heart and pondered over it. That is the way God’s Word is to be heard. 

Perhaps that is the difference between us and Mother Mary. There are many things, we have not understood in the Word, or the call we have received. There are many things that we have not understood in our life. Why are things going wrong for us? Not understanding, what do we do? We keep it all in our head and Mary kept it all in her heart. That’s fine, theoretically. Let’s see what significance it has for us. What is the difference between the head and the heart? The head does all the thinking. How do we think? We think in the light of our experiences and the knowledge that we have accumulated. And that knowledge is limited. Therefore, our thinking is ultimately limited. If we try to put stress on this aspect, then our heads break. We become desperate; self-pity, clinging to the law (or rules) rather than the spirit, need to please the persons in authority for acceptance, complaining about others to seek recognition, all these arise because inside we are broken. Because our thinking is! 

What about the heart? The heart is where God lives! According to the Bible, the heart is the ‘dwelling place of God.’ And whatever I don’t understand, I keep it in the heart and ponder over it; as to what is God trying to tell me. We wait upon God! Head is my thinking – my pride and self-righteousness. Heart is my humility – I do not know, I am not perfect. I wait upon God to reveal to me. I wait to listen to his Word. I wait to hear His voice. And that is done in Prayer. We allow God to speak, to guide and direct us. “Do what He tells you.” This is what Mary shows us- to listen to God’s word, not by the head but by the heart.

Let me sum up in three words; Mary, as the Shining Star, guides us closer to Jesus in Honesty, Integrity and Prayer.

The Powerfilled - CHOICE (clarified)

 “CHOICE” – such a powerful word!!!

(Just a little upgrading of the thought that I typed in the previous blog.)

 

     It sounds so nice and it indeed is: choice – where I value the different options I have, give them the attention that is due and then I choose one which gives meaning to my life. Oh!, but stopping there, will not get me anywhere.

     The choice has to be made. Yes! And that too a wise one. We have got that part right. The most important part after making a proper choice is to be committed to it. Choice without a proper commitment is just a preference. Today, I choose this and tomorrow whoa, I choose that. But life isn’t lived this way. Moreover, when I choose to respond to God’s call; I choose to live it every day. I don’t intend to take a holiday from that choice. And what will really help me out there, is COMMITMENT. When I commit myself for that choice, all the other options just fade away. Now, you may say, “That goes bang opposite to what I wrote in the previous blog.” And that is where I received clarification. (Thanks to Fr. Vinod) 

     Let me explain, when you commit myself to the choice you make, all the other options that you have had fade away with proper attention having been given to them. Since you have already given them the attention that is due, and have chosen another over them, you have disempowered them. You have chosen something that is of meaning to you. You empower yourself because the choice resides in you. You will be free then. It is you who have made the choice. You can then create your future freely with a proper sense of responsibility. You thus become a creator.

     To cap it off: Choice without commitment is just dillydallying around. Be powerful. Commit yourself to the choice you make and live life to the full. 

 

 

Remember you are here for a purpose.

Find it.

Know it.

Realize it in your life.

Be committed to it.

And live it. 

The Powerfilled - CHOICE

 “The past is an illusion, the future is fiction; there is only now.”
Song: There is only now By Souls of Mischief.

 As I am nearing 24^th May, 2017 – the day when I will profess to give my whole life to God, many questions and thoughts are continuously racing through my mind begging for my attention. Deep questions regarding the real purpose of my life, ‘what I should do with these gifts that He has given me,’ are waiting to be acknowledged by me. And I have realized that these won’t be satisfied with some superficial answers but real responses that have the power to change the course of my life and direct it in a particular direction. All along I was thinking that I am making a decision that would lead me to 24^th May; and it was there that I went wrong.

A powerful reflection given by Marina Chechi helped me to clear some doubts and give a clear focus on my calling. And I would like to share it with you. She told me that my next step is not a decision but a choice. And I asked her, “What’s the difference?” Her words - Choice is powerful and a decision is not. The word ‘decide’ means ‘to kill’. (Another word to clear the meaning: ‘sui-cide’, it means ‘to kill oneself.’) So when I am making a decision, what I am really doing is killing all the other options and spearheading only towards one point. Well, I thought, that’s a good thing, isn’t it? Who would want to be distracted by the many options? Having a clear focus is wonderful, what do you say? But later on, I got the point. In killing all the other options, I am throwing them out of my attention. Since, I am not giving them the attention that they need, they somehow come up in my life in various ways and pull me down. And that slows down my progress. I am talking about my vocation here and the many options that I will be killing if I decide to go ahead with this attitude.

Choice – Here I will value the different options I have, give them the attention that is due and then I make a choice for one which gives meaning to my life. This makes so many things simple and clear. I am not running away from anything. I become powerful as I give attention to the one thing that gives meaning to me. And I commit myself to that choice and live my life accordingly.
Back to the intro lyric:  The past is an illusion, the future is fiction; there is only now. The past is an illusion in the sense that I have no power over it. I have power over the present – the NOW. And with the choices that I make, I will CREATE my future. As only few days are left for that big day, I choose to live my days consciously with the help from God; Mary, my mother and with the support from my family and friends.

Go ahead. 

Make wise choices. 

You are powerful. 

Create your future. 

 God bless !!!

TIME

There are times,

Great and beautiful,

Some sweet

And some sour-like times.

Learn to respect it bro,

You and me don’t know

When and where does it go.

Like water in a river,

At one place it doesn’t stay

“I won’t wait for anyone,”

It always does say.

Some say that time is yours,

And some, “It’s mine!”

But there are also people

Who believe its Divine.

And when the time’s up,

“Now Stop,” it will say.

"Let God decide, heav’n or hell

Will be your place of stay."

- Arup Chatri

Std IX

Don Bosco Lonavla

A secret letter to God.............. my heartfelt gratitude to Him.

 

 Dear God,

With more than what

That makes one’s life happy

I thank thee, dear God

For generously blessing me.

 

With loving parents

And a superb bro

You nurtured me

Gushing my heart, with love, to flow.

You filled my life with dedicated teachers

You placed them as stars in the night sky

Yet within reach, which was frequent

You guided me, showed me the path to LOVE LIFE

 

Then you gave me the grace to hear your call

And with the greatest blessing of Our Wondrous Queen

Loving and firm; Mother and Warrior,

You both held my hand and made me a Man.

Interspersed with water vapor, as in a rainbow

Invisible, yet with the sole reason, for the magic of light

Just as the same for my meaningful life

Are the formators who gave me their precious effort and time.

An encouraging pat, a loving smile

A funny name that comes straight from the heart

Makes me feel so alive, and happy, and love lost

Grateful indeed for friends, whom I sincerely trust.

Silly things, that we might laugh on

Being there, especially in times of need

Like salt and spice that makes food tasty

Thanks God, for this fantabulous community

You gave me life on this special day

At the start of the novena for your coming

To prepare the Way for you dear Lord

May with many hearts, my mission be.

Thanks indeed for your many blessings,

Heart-touching encounters with people

with many soul-raising experiences

And especially for this wondrous life

Yes, life – L I F E

Love In Full-on Experience

Through Her Love to You, O Lord

Through Her Love, to You, O Lord.

I thank You, O Lord for giving me Your Mother.

Through Her Love, to You, O Lord.

For it is She who since my birth

Has preserved me, and has now presented me to You.

I lived my life carefree

As if I had no problems.

While internally it kept piling up

Under the blanket of a false self-image.

It is during the Intensive Journal

That I came to the realization of MY TRUE SELF,

Which the unconscious self had hidden

And prepared itself for an opportune time.

All the events, the many persons I met;

All have affected me in many ways

Which until this time

I could neither feel, experience nor see clearly.

It is when, that I began to dig my well

That I clearly understood how a caterpillar becomes a butterfly.

It is then, I started to face much of my problems

Which because of my ignorance and carelessness, were left unsolved.

It was the time, when I was engulfed in darkness,

When I was in the dirty muck of my well,

When I could find no one to help and support me,

That was the time then I had to face my        true self

He was dirty, ego-centric and wholly success-oriented.

He laughed at me and pointed me out

Saying, “WHO and WHAT you are is because of ME.

Come, come and make obeisance to me.”

What he said was truly right.

What I am is because of him.

Then from nowhere, a ray of light flickered

Maybe through him or from behind him.

I gathered strength and blurted out:

“It is because of you that fear entered me,

The fear of not to succeed.

Scared of relationships, you have made me a lone man,

And hid my talents just with the fear of failing.”

“I don’t like you.

I don’t want you.

I don’t need you.

I can stand on my own feet.”

Hearing all these that I said,

He felt a rage of resentment.

But what could he do,

He was not me and I was not him.

Knowing that nothing can be done,

In all his ego and narcisstic attitude,

He blew up, he exploded

And thus he destroyed himself.

Now I was hurt, I was left alone,

In a dazed mood, I looked around

And what I saw was to change my whole life;

It was the beginning of the never end.

I saw Jesus with open arms.

I cried out and ran to him.

I embraced him as a long-lost lover

And asked him, “Where were You, O Lord?”

He just looked at me,

He patted me on the back and

Said, “Well done, my faithful friend.

I wanted you to fight yourself and

Come out as a liberated man.”

“I know what you want to know.

I was with you all the time,

I waited for you to make an effort

And you played your part very well.”

I asked him about that ray of hope

Without which possibly I would have been stuck up with him.

“That ray of hope which you saw, my friend,” He said,

“Was my Mother, your Mother.”

 “How could you miss Her, Nelson?” He asked.

“She was the one who helped you play your crucial part.

Without Her, you wouldn’t have been able to come out.

Without Her, you wouldn’t be here.”

I looked at her, so magnificently dressed,

A smiling face, radiant with light.

“Thank you,” I said, “My dear Mother.

And lead me always to Your Son.”

And so in every moment, may my actions proclaim

“Through Her LOVE, to you, O’ Lord.”